New Webpage… New Adventures

My wife and I have decided to consolidate and jointly publish our blogs @ http://www.katemdahlin.com.  Our passion is for people to achieve an exceptional life… be it relational, physical, emotional, spiritual, etc.  Creating Exceptional is what we’re all about… I hope you’ll continue following our blogs, life stories, and future endeavors.  We will both be blogging monthly and adding relevant content that we hope will inspire you to take the next step and aspire to something bigger, better, greater… and EXCEPTIONAL.

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With great pleasure and excitement I am pleased to announce the exciting news of adding another writer to this site!

At six feet and with a smile that melts anyone, he is GQ in the flesh. The one and only “Stevo”. We have been married for over 11 years and as he is an excellent leader, speaker and writer we are joining forces to bring you the top tips and tricks in creating the exceptional life.

His focus will be more on spiritual growth, “man-ly” things, and on relationships. I am pleased to share the platform with him and give him the due respect and space for his ideas and thoughts to shine. To give you, our readers, clarity in being a person on fire for the things that matter most.

He and I (together) are passionate about marriages. We have been working with couples for over six years to fan the flame for a firm foundation and passionate life as a team. He will be giving all kinds of tips and ideas on creating opportunity for you to thrive and perform at a higher level in all of your endeavours, and relationships.

Steve likes to golf, take our kids to the lake, grill out, “Cheers!” everyone, make a priority of date night, have a great looking lawn, give with abandon, and laugh a lot. He has been blogging as a solo writer for some time now and we feel its time to join forces and create easy for our followers. He is a rock star when it comes to content and I know each and every one of you is going to be so inspired by what he brings to the table.

Welcome aboard Steve! I’m thrilled to be starting this part of our writing! You are my fairy tale.

With Heels and Heart,
-Kate

“Being engaged is a way of doing life, a way of living and loving. It’s about going to extremes and expressing the bright hope that life offers us, a hope that makes us brave and expels darkness with light. That’s what I want my life to be all about – full of abandon, whimsy, and in love.”
― Bob Goff, Love Does: Discover a Secretly Incredible Life in an Ordinary World

Jesus

Abba Father, thank you for your son, Jesus.

Thank you for weaving Him into the fabric of your redemptive plan since the very beginning.

Thank you for loving us enough to secure our position in Your Kingdom, as heirs and children of the King, without a single act in human history that would merit such an honor.

Thank you for the love that originated in in Jesus that has trancended the centuries.  A love we can experience today, in this very moment, and give away to others in order to usher us all into Your holy presence where acceptance, relationship, and eternal purpose can be found.

-SJD-

Time Away…

When’s the last time you truly got away… and I don’t just mean heading out for a weekend trip (although those quick getaways are sometimes just what the doctor ordered)…

I’m talking about phone silence, email abstinence, abstaining from chores, relishing in late breakfasts over mimosas, long quiet walks, getting lost in a good book, doing a unique family activity, getting lost gazing into a fire, spending too much time in a hottub, cooking a massive meal with plenty of leftovers, star gazing late at night once the kids are asleep, or cuddle under a blanket with the person of your dreams.

Are you building this into your schedule?  Are you making time for what’s truly important in life?  I’d be able to retire in my 30’s If only I had a dollar for every time someone says how fast the “time flies by”.  Time is precious and we can’t control the amount of it that we’ll be given.  Carpe Diem (seize the day) is one of my favorite slogans from Robin William’s “Dead Poet’s Society” film… seize every moment my friends – don’t let a minute go by without thoughtfully planning how to maximize it to the fullest!

Summertime is the perfect time to take that much needed time away.  Spend the money, you won’t regret it.  And if your boss is not “cool” with you leaving your laptop at the house so you can enjoy some much needed time off… well, maybe it’s time to start looking elsewhere.  I recognize that limited communication/monitoring of the business might be needed if you are an executive or CEO… but come on people, you know you’ll be refreshed, energized, and ready to tackle challenges after a time of isolation.  I guarantee that if you compromise this area of your life, you will suffer dearly in all other areas – albeit emotional, relational, physical, spiritual, etc.

My job requires me to interface with counterparts around the world… I’m always jealous when I receive out of office messages from my colleagues in India, Europe, etc.  Many of them taking a solid 4 weeks off to recharge with friend and loved ones.

So… what are you going to do in your current situation?  My advice (whether merited or not)… turn the phone off, shut the laptop down, put in the vacation days, pull some extra cash out of the bank that you’ve worked hard for, and grab the hand of the person you love most and go off the grid… disappear for awhile… live life to the the fullest.  I promise you’ll never regret that decision.

-SJD

 

Unplugged

Amazing perspective on the balance of the trivial many from the vital few.

Creating Exceptional

My husband and I read together. Out loud. There is a whole train of thought that reading aloud is one of the best things you can do for your brain but, for us its more about being together, doing something “old-fashioned” and simple. Going back to the basics and to things that make us joyful. Reading aloud was one of those childhood things that takes me back to days of Narnia and Lord of the Rings and my parents voices at bedtime. Between the amount of shows and social media, the art of reading can get cut out and squashed out of life. And that is saying something when a book-worm like myself says it!!!

This summer my lofty goals of reading are by far way behind but, I am still relishing in some good reads and enjoying the process of slower months and my children’s nap times. A book…

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Remember

A great reminder as we approach Easter this year…

Creating Exceptional

Recently I have been writing. A lot. I have enjoyed every minute of it too. I am very old school when it comes to writing. I like pen and notebook to do my drafts. I can go much faster that way with my thought process. (As you all know how challenging typing is for me.) I then transfer my thoughts after that. Yes, time-consuming and very slow. Its been daunting at times because the tasks I’ve been writing on have been not fully fictional. I’m writing part of my personal story inter woven into the characters I’m doing.

As I do this I have become more and more aware of just how flawed and just how amazing God’s grace has been on my life. I am not catholic but I do enjoy processing the tradition of Lent. This year,  I wanted to make sure that Easter doesn’t just pass me…

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Proactive Personality

My summer has been busy. Its been crazy busy. We have completely re-done the outside of our home, I have registered my oldest for three preschool’s and hoped she would make it into the one I …

Source: Proactive Personality

True Love

Love is in the air with Valentine’s Day rapidly approaching!  Grab those roses, gifts that come in small boxes, and reservations for those sold out restaurants.  But before getting swept up in the emotions of the weekend I wonder if we can touch on this topic of love.

If you are married you probably think you have a grasp on this… or at least you do a pretty good job at it.  Sure, we can make our spouses feel loved, appreciated, important, valued and choose to be a servant leader in the relationship.  We can prove our commitment and dedication by being a physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual partner – sharing in the natural ups and downs of life and being a source of strength.  While this is extremely important and should be your highest prioritized relationship after Christ, I wonder if we adopt this same effort and attitude towards those around us – friends, colleagues, acquaintances, and strangers – in our daily life?

1 Corinthians 13 is an in-depth picture of what true love is.  When Jesus came, he did away with the old law way of thinking that said spiritual maturity could be measured by your love for God – which is a mystery to others and can only be observed by one’s actions.  As a New Testament church, Jesus declared that your love for God is important but there is another “law”, joined with the first, that will truly demonstrate your love for God and that is how you love one another (Matthew 22:36-40).  Well dang it… now I cannot hide behind my religious language, loopholes, and good deeds.  Now others can clearly assess my relationship with God BY HOW I TREAT THOSE AROUND ME.  That’s scary, that’s real… and that’s unfiltered.

Maybe it’s time for a love check… if I were to interview 100 people who range from your closest friend to the lady who checks you out at Publix once a week… how would they rate you given their interaction and observance of your actions?  If any of those answers came back less than desirable it would arguably have a direct correlation to your current walk with Christ.  Let’s not inflate ourselves with religion and get absorbed in the Christian bubble because we read our Bible in the morning, give a tithe, and listen to biblical podcasts and David Crowder Band on the way to work.  The true test is in your love for others.  That’s true love.

I’ll close with The Message version of 1 Corinthians 13… be encouraged and be a light!

“If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. 2 If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing.

3-7 If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.

Love never gives up.

Love cares more for others than for self.

Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.

Love doesn’t strut,

Doesn’t have a swelled head,

Doesn’t force itself on others,

Isn’t always “me first,”

Doesn’t fly off the handle,

Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,

Doesn’t revel when others grovel,

Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,

Puts up with anything,

Trusts God always,

Always looks for the best,

Never looks back,

But keeps going to the end.”

-SD

The Power of Life & Death

That’s a lot of power.  A power that literally bookends and fills the entire spectrum of our existence.  Not just the power to impact someone personally, physically, emotionally, economically, financially, spiritually, or mentally, but the ability to impact your ultimate destiny.  That’s a lot of power.

Proverbs 18:21 says that this power is in your tongue.  Yes, WORDS have this kind of power.  How seldom do we actually give words the type of attention and respect that they deserve?  I know I don’t.  Well, I do, but not always in the most important areas of life.

I’m what most people would call a charismatic person.  I’m in sales, can start conversations out of thin air (when I want to) and am comfortable in my own skin.  I can hang out in silence or I can talk for hours.  I love to present, speak, and converse.  I labor over 4-5 sentence emails because the words I use (or don’t use) will either get me in the door of a new prospect or potentially lock me out completely.  I make a living out of saying the right thing at the right time.

So how do I screw this up so often?  I’m reminded as I read this truth from scripture that this is nothing new… I’ve heard this before and yes, at my core, I know it to be true.  Why then – when things are not going well, when situations spin out of control, when problems arise without warning, when something does’t go as planned, when kids are a challenge, when my wife (whom I love with everything I am) can’t understand or is upset with me – do I not pause and remember that the next thing that comes out of my mouth has the power to heal or hurt, elevate or tear down, bring happiness or sadness, joy or tension, embrace or shun, love or crush those around me?

Too much talk leads to sin and offenses are unavoidable in the presence of many words (Proverbs 10:19).  Let’s choose our words wisely and not be selective in the areas of our life where we choose to adopt this principle.  What if we really were quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger?  What would that do to our relationship with our spouse, kids, parents, family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, and strangers?  Speak wisely today and build up those around you.  Be purposeful, be careful, and be life-giving.

-SJD

Fear of the Unknown

This week the U.S. Open tees off at Chambers Bay (@ChambersBayGolf) just outside Seattle, Washington.  I will be speaking at a wedding on Saturday but look forward to watching the finale on Sunday.  The other day I was perusing @PGATour and came across a fantastic article by @PGATOURSMartin.

There has been a lot of debate about the choice of Chambers Bay as it is “untested” in the golf community – it has never hosted a professional event – and skeptics wonder if it will live up to the expectations.  Apparently, the course is riddled with challenges (links play, constant elevation change, concrete-like greens, tee boxes could double as football fields – allowing drastic yardage changes each day that will keep players guessing (and maybe needing a calculator).  This has obviously stirred the pot and resulted in positive and negative comments coming from the players.  But the one comment I want to focus on is from legendary @jacknicklaus – check out what he said:

Leave it to Jack Nicklaus, a four-time U.S. Open champion, to speak soberly on the subject. He’s never been to Chambers Bay, but reminded players, “Somebody’s name is going to be on the trophy.” He enjoyed hearing players complain in the days before a major because he could discount those players as contenders. “(The course) isn’t supposed to suit your game,” Nicklaus said. “You are supposed to suit your game to the golf course.”

WOW.  There is a lot of experience and wisdom talking there.  Did you hear that?  He LOVES hearing players complain because he knows for certain they will not be in contention.  Why?  Because so much of life’s battles (not just in golf) are won or lost in your mind and Jack knows this.  He knows that the players complaining don’t stand a chance this next Thursday-Sunday… the course will pick their game apart.  On the other hand, those embracing the challenge will find ways to improve their game… maybe what worked in the past won’t work there this time.  Maybe they’ll have to have more imagination, maybe they’ll have to be less/more aggressive than they are used to.  But attitude more than often determines your altitude in life.  Someone will win… and someone will be crowned champion next Sunday despite the arguable fair or unfair environment that will be found at Chambers Bay.

What about you?  Do you immediately disqualify yourself when challenges arise because of your attitude and perspective?  It may be tough… it may require you to acquire new skills… it may require a strategy change… it may cause your confidence to waiver… it may test you in new areas… it may showcase your flaws.  BUT, you have a choice.  And it starts in your mind.  Don’t accept defeat before you even try.  Look for ways to grow and better yourself in every situation you find yourself in.  You’ll win some and lose some… but you’ll never be in the winners circle if negativity and complaining characterizes your approach to life’s challenges.  Make the change and step up to the ball of life with swagger, confidence, and a little imagination.

-SD

A $100 Cup of Lemonade

@ColemanMcDowell, a writer on Golf.com (@golf_com), wrote a piece about Phil Mickelson the other day that caught my attention.  Through his extraordinary career, Phil has been known for his kind demeanor, genuine smile, personable attributes, and generosity, but the following story seemed to add a lot of merit to the hype surrounding Phil:

Some players hit the gym before their tournament rounds. Others grind on the range trying to find their swing. Phil Mickelson drives around handing out $100 bills at lemonade stands. Before his opening round at the Memorial Tournament, Mickelson stopped at the lemonade stand of 6-year-old Roland Van Karsen and 8-year-old Elise Van Karsen. The five-time major champ paid for his lemonade with a $100 bill. And let the kids keep the change.

“All we were doing was sitting here, then we saw this white car drive up,” Roland told the Columbus Dispatch. “He just opened the door and said, ‘Can we have a glass of lemonade?’ All it took was one little thing for him to give us a good tip.” Ann Van Karsen, the mother of the entrepreneurs, said there wasn’t any time for photos or autographs. “It happened so fast that we were kind of stunned,” she said. “What a great guy, though, right? So generous and the kids will have a memory like that forever.”

It’s easy to get hung up on the amount he paid for the lemonade… while significant, I don’t feel it is the main story.  What is important is the message he’s sending to these young kids (if I can read into it) – “Hard work pays off – keep up the good work and don’t abandon your strong work ethic”.  The story goes on to explain that one of the boys is saving his money for a Kindle and the other one is just saving for now.  In a society that often encourages an entitlement mentality, Phil is trying to encourage a different type of character… values that if learned will produce a lifetime of rewards.

Who have you encouraged recently?  When you see strong character, work ethic, or initiative are you quick to reinforce that behavior to a peer, colleague, mentee, family member, spouse, child, or stranger?  I challenge you to not get so tunnel visioned in day-to-day life that you miss these opportunities.  If Phil Mickelson can find the time, who arguably is busier than anyone reading this post, then you can too.  Go change a life today – be a voice of encouragement!

-SD